Fish out of the water..

Blubblub.

The positiveness from TCP is slowly but surely wearing away.
The old feelings are coming..
I guess they never really went away.
Oh wells.

I've been feeling so tired lately.
No, I'm not slacking slacking around.
I just feel so tired that I just don't wanna do anything.
Mum's been bugging me to get a job but like hello?
There's not enough time left.
Seriously.
7 Weeks is short for a job.
And look at how many weeks are left...
Plus I've got like TWO more camps coming up.
28-30 SEP - NPSU TBC
7-10 OCT - Photog Camp

See?
How am I supposed to work like that?!
Plus I DO NOT want to work during the school term so it's like..
Who's gonna hire me?
Everyone wants commitment.
Even for part-timers.

Anyways, that aside..
Life's been..
Up and down again.
Though, mostly down, meaning B-O-R-I-N-G.
Wanted to blog yesterday but I find turning the comp on really tedious and BORING.
There's really nothing to do online. :O
And I'm the type of person who forgets what she wanted to rant after the moment has passed.
So it's like it never happened. :o

Was successful in baking today!
Shall bake again tomorrow with the help of AHZY to decorate! :P
I shall aspire to bake more nice stuff.
Then I can feed my lil' pets. AHAHHAHAHHA.
They've been "starving".
TEEHEE.

Kay, let's just see what happens in the near future.

♥ MandamandamandaG.

Embrace the inner me..

Yes, it does not suck to be me.

Back from TCP Empowerment Camp (8-10SEP)

I won't say that it'd changed my life..

Because it didn't.

But it did affect it.

Affected my thinking.

Changed my mindset.

Opened my eyes.

Let me see clearly once again.

But no, I won't blame all the things that I've gone through..

For I've learnt much from each experience.

The pain, hurt, disappointment..

And the joy, smiles and excitement made me who I am today.

I might not be perfect.

Never have been.

And I always thought that standing by what I believed in was the way I should be.

To be stronger, to get closer to whatever I wanted to achieve.

But I didn't realise that I was actually forcing my beliefs onto the people around me.

Till the point where they avoided telling me things because I won't listen with an open heart & mind.

It was what I learnt through TCP that I finally saw all that.

The 3A principle:

Aware

Accept

Adapt

Will be held close to my heart.

To guide me along as I walk the long road ahead of me.

There has been too many times where I skipped the "Accept" stage and just simply moved on to Adapting.

That was the part where on the surface I was accepting but in a way, I didn't?

So I will change.

Learn to accept everyone for who they are.

And not try to force my own opinions on them.

Because that's not fair.

And I'll just hope that everyone will do the same.

Furthermore, the word "try" is gonna get kicked out of my dictionary.

'Cause if I wanna do something, I'm gonna do it.

I'm gonna achieve it.

Because I believe in myself.

And the people around me.

On a brighter note, I've met an awesome group of people!
From my mentors: Christine and Hosanna;
to my fellow Americans: Cassandra, Bridget, Laila, Lorraine, Li Yan, Atricia, Amelia, Cheryl, Nora, Rachel and Geraldine. :D
They made camp really fun!
Especially Cass and Bridget cause they let me bunk with them!
Teehee.
Late night chitchat sessions at Loft@94 is super awesome.
Learnt loads about them and other random stuff.
And I will never forget Cass' laughter.
And what Bridget said that set Cass & I laughing till our sides ached.
OMG.
HAHAHAHA.

And these will be added to my bank of memories.
Kept forever in a safe lil' place.

♥ MandamandamandaG.
The next time I say I accept you for who you are, I will mean it with my whole heart.

Down and out.

我觉得有些事情用英文说是不足够的。

有些话是留在心里永远都不能说出来的话。

总对自己的生活很失望，自己到底是做错了什么。

总是感到很失望，可能是自己要求太高但又觉得不是。

难道我的所作所为都是错的吗？

为什么会这样呢？

难道我所有的朋友对我的了解那么少吗？

好自备哦。

在我身边的人没有一个真正的了解我。

觉得很闲，对什么事都已经没有什么兴趣了。

因为不值得，只让自己觉得很累。

现在的我已经对什么都没有什么期望了。

已经习惯这失望的感觉。

好可悲吧。

这就是我那么可笑的生活。

但请不要认为是我不要给机会因为我真的很累，累到我不想在试了。

而且也不想在让自己感到失望，所以试试站在我的立场吧。

♥ MandamandamandaG.