Best Friend.

Someone to do stupid things with.

So according to the online dictionary..

Best Friend: The one friend who is the closest to you

But I don't think I ever really had even one?
No one that actually knows me, or even bother to.

Some people like to say that I'm their Best Friend.
But I guess their definition is the same as that of the online dictionary.
But not what I believe in.

A Best Friend to me should be someone who actually knows me.
Knows what I like.
What I dislike.
Knows that when I rant, I'm just letting off steam.
Not asking for comments or trying to change their impression of certain people.
Shows that they care for me the way I do for them.
I don't believe that showing that care requires using money.
Spending lots of money on someone isn't showing that you care.
At least not to me.
We would have endless conversations that will never run out.
Secrets with each other.
Not kept from each other.
Inside jokes that nobody gets.
And the simple way of never letting the other feel neglected.
Or that they are being used.
Being able to do stupid things together.
Taking nice photos for each other.
Knowing and understanding that I would like to be in photos too.
In all my albums..I'm in like only a few photos.
Yet nobody notices.
Yes, I love taking photos.
Capturing moments.
But sometimes, I wanna be in them too.
Nobody gets that.
And even if they tried, I'd just look weird and awkward.
I don't make you look that way in photos, do I?

Absolutely cannot stand people who work this way:
When I need your help, I remember you.
When I don't, "who are you again?"

Am I asking for too much?
No.
This is just the basic thing that everyone wants, no?

Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind.  "Pooh!" he whispered.  "Yes, Piglet?"  "Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw.  "I just wanted to be sure of you."  ~A.A. Milne

On the other hand, I have plenty of  friends who expect so much.
It's not said outright, of course.
But I know they expect.
Yet, they don't give a care about what I want or need.
All they do is take and take and take.
Why am I giving so much?
When I get nothing in return.
It's not like I'm asking for a lot.
I'm just asking for some reciprocation.

Afterall, people always say that real friends will always give back to you and all.
Since when was friendship supposed to be tiring and draining?
Nowadays, when I start feeling disappointed and all..
I just ignore.
Or give the situation little attention.
So unlike who I was before.

I don't know what to do.
It's like people just don't get it.
And what can I say?

Even sometimes, wanting to be there for someone else is just so hard.
Because they don't bother to listen.
They just wanna wallow in self-pity and blame the whole world.
But I believe that we can control our own fate.
At least some parts of it.
And what do they expect people to do or think?
Pity them?
Sympathise with them?
Empathise with them?
Ignore them?

It's like get over yourself already.
Do you even hear yourself?
Once or twice is normal.
But frequently and continuously?
Do something about things instead of just wallowing in self-pity, seriously.

Just because you think it's so, doesn't mean it's so.
Ugly?
Seriously?
You're attached and before that you had tons of suitors.
Guys who liked you.
Just because they aren't the ones you want doesn't mean that they are blind.
So open your own eyes.
See the world around you.
There's so many more things and people who are worse off than you.
But then again, I know you wouldn't care.
'Cause that's other people.
Not you.

Don't you get that I feel that way sometimes too?

♥Mandamandamanda G.